All I Want For Christmas

I know you feel this is the first Christmas without me,
And all these Christmas decorations you can't stand to see.
I know you keep asking God "why?"
I also know sometimes late at night you lay in your bed and cry,
I know this will be hard but there are some things I need you to do for me,
This Christmas do a little make-believe.
I want you to smile, when you want to cry,
And I want you to live, even when you feel like you want to die.
When your heart has no song, I still want you to sing,
When your hands don't feel like cooking go and make that sweet potato pie to bring.
I want you to laugh when you heard the kids sing Jingle Bells,
and I want you to get your Christmas cards done and mailed.
I know this seems like a lot to as of you,
but in return this is what I will do.
I will be there to wrap my arms around you when you are down,
and I will make sure you hear joke to make you smile instead of frown.
I will help you to remember the words to even the hardest Christmas song,
But most of all I will help you understand that Heaven is where I truly belong.
So this Christmas season, I'll still be there,
I will be the cold wind that blows your hair.
I'll be the twinkle in the lights on your Christmas tree.
I'll be in the sound of the children's voices as they sing, 
and I'll be in the giggle you hear when they open the gifts you bring.
I'll be in the scent of Christmas dinner in the air,
and when you feel that "special" warmth you'll know I am there.
So this isn't the first Christmas without me,
Just look around and there I will be.

Merry Christmas Justin, I love you and I miss you so much.

Sister

As the fall wind blows thru my hair,
I look up and pray you will be there.
I sigh and realize it's just tricks on my mind,
like when I look into a crowd praying it's your face I find.

As the leaves fall all around me,
I am blinking back tears I hope no one sees.
As the leaves hit the ground,
The world goes silent my breathe is the only sound.

I am swept back to early spring,
Where  Amazing Grace is what we had the church sing.
Where I see you laying there with a look of peace on your face,
For a brief second I knew you were in a better place.

As the days get shorter and the nights seem so long,
I get angry because you are gone.
I know it is selfish and I should feel shame,
And I don't know at whom I am angry or who I blame.
Do I blame God for taking you and leaving behind so much pain,
Or maybe its you I blame for playing that stupid game!

But truth be told it is me that I hate,
Why didn't I notice the signs before it was too late???
As the leaves fall and land on your grave and the wind gives an eerie moan,
I am so sad and feel so alone.
Out of nowhere I feel a warm hand on my cold one,
and I look up to see who is there,
I feel that same warm hand stroke my hair.

As the tears fall from my eyes,
it was then that I realized.
Your not really gone and didn't mean to leave,
You've just went ahead to save a place for our family and me.....

Love always,

Sister

JUSTIN I LOVE

---

YOU & I MISS YOU

---

LOVE MOM

Questions of the Heart

Is it your scent I smell in the air?
Is it you or the wind blowing my hair?
Is it your shadow in the corner I see?
Is it your voice I hear calling to me?
Is it your tears I feel or is it just rain?
Is your heart hurting? Is it feeling my pain?
Is it your hand on my shoulder after I just cried?
Did you feel my heart stop when they told me you had died?
Did you see us all gather around?
Did you see us weep as they lowered you down?
Did you get the balloons on your birthday?
Do you hear my kids when they pray for you everyday?
Do you know how much I loved you and how much I cared?
Do you too regret how little time we shared?
Do you miss us as much as we miss you?
Do you feel lost like you don't know what to do?
Have you heard that time heals a broken heart?
Do you know when so I can tell my heart when it will start?
Can you do on little favor for me?
Can you ask God to help us let you free....

Love you,
Sister

         Only God Truly Knows Why

One night as I lay in my bed having just cried;
I felt someone sit down at my side.
As I looked I just couldn't believe;
God was sitting next to me.
As I closed my eyes thinking this has to be a dream;
God carressed my face and whispered"Things are not always as they seem".
As I looked up into His eyes,
I bowed my head and I just cried.
After a few minutes I found the strength to whisper "Why?"
He tilt His head and gave me a weak smile;
"I know" He said "you have been asking that for awhile"
"I know you think I am cruel or maybe I am punishing you"
He sighed " but I have things for your loved one to do".
"I need my army of angels to stand proud and true"
"and I always need more angels to look after you"
"Why my brother" I cried "Why him?"
God smile brightened
You know as well as I do he was the only angel strong enouch to look after you."
"My mission for coming to you my dear;
is to let you know if you need us we are always here".
As I looked over God's shoulder there my brother stood;
he stood tall and proud and gave me a smile that only my brother could.
As God stood up and walked to my brothers side;
the tears just poured from my eyes as I cried.
However the tears this time weren't the same;
they weren't from the  grief, sorrow or unbearable pain;
They were from happiness and peace;
and soon the tears just seemed to cease.
As God and my brother turned away to leave I didn't experience any dread;
only great pride as I watched my brother's angel wings spread....

I miss you Justin
Love Sister

We all do and I will never forget him.
None of us will and I love you and know that this is hard
for you but we all are going through a bad time and from
now on,life is a bad time.
I love you.         
 
your granddaughter,
Jasmine Bryant